I love halloween.
I really do. It is without a doubt my favorite holiday. If I have to explain why... you should probably just go hang yourself right now, because you won't be finding any entertainment in what is to come.
So, every year we do this more people come back... so every year it gets bigger. Last year we had a 1 car garage and an easy-up. This year we had exactly double that. Next year... well... jesus have mercy on the lil children, because I won't.
As usual the video sort of reflects how poor the visibility is inside. The children really never stood a chance.
Let me start by saying that 2 people really stood out this year.
First: Nick makes one hell of an evil surgeon. I'm guessing it is because he draws from his work experience. Wherever his inspiration comes from, he doesn't take this holiday lightly.
Second: Steve wins the trooper award for this year. He was the lucky one who got to lay on the table with no shirt in October... covered in cold sticky gore. Hearts, livers, kidneys, duck heads, blood... you name it... he was covered in it. And on top of all that, I poured liquid latex over the hairiest part of his stomach when I was making a fake wound. I bet that was hard to get out once it hardened. Bwahahahaha.
Sure he screamed like a woman, but hey... can you blame him? On top of everything else, anything that touched him stuck to him and took hair with it. This was of course a source of endless amusement. I guess he was a source of amusement in general. But at least he knows it is someone else's turn next year. That someone knows who he is. Also, for some reason the boy was wearing a sombrero the whole time. That isn't the sort of thing you question, though. I suppose it was because of this that he felt it necessary to yell things like "Mucho Paino" throughout the evening.
That aside it was pretty much standard operation. Against all my better judgement I let Jess play a cd with some music on it because she promised me it was evil carnival music to go with her clown getup.
She tricked me. It was a mix between: jazz flute, chase music from a 70's cop show and the opening of Thriller. Sweet Jesus eating a taco... what were you thinking, Jess?! Upon review of the video we had it was all the more obvious how horrid it was. It's a bit too late to be worried about it now, though.
A woman from one of my jobs stopped by with her daughter in law and grandchildren. Tragedy struck.
I'm sure she wasn't the only one, but it was the only instance that I had confirmed by a third party. Everybody point and laugh. I mean come on... I chased her kids down the street with an ax and they didn't pee themselves.
I have fond memories of this clip. This lil girl walked up... I popped out and she screamed at me. So I screamed back. She screamed again... repeat. You get the idea.
Visibility really was bad at times.
Actually... now that I watch that last clip I recall that there were people hanging out in there that I don't know. I think one of them was somebody's brother... but there were people that I did not recognize.
I have no idea who that kid is... but he was around for quite awhile.
Anyway... quite a bit of funny stuff happened outside, away from the camera. Most of it involved myself and Otis. Meet Otis.
It was odd. Everyone was totally fine with someone walking up to them with an ax, but only until they knew it was real. Than all bets were off. I can't count the number of times somebody would ask me if it was a real ax. All I had to to was let it drop and drag behind me making that awesome menacing sound like only metal grinding on cement can. Then... well... they screamed and ran... and so I took chase. I did set a new personal distance record on chasing one kid, outdoing last year's run. At the end of the evening a few of us were chasing what was left of Steve up the street when some dude sitting in a lawnchair drinking a beer with some other older folks started yelling at me. It went as follows:
Old guy: Hey! What the hell do you think you're doing?
ME: um... chasing that guy with an ax?
Old Guy: Is that thing REAL?
Me: *lets it fall to street and drag as I walk towards him* Sounds pretty real to me, hoss.
Old Guy: THAT IS TOO SCARY BLAH BLAH DANGEROUS BLAH. I AM CALLING THE COPS BLAH BLAH BLAH. OTHER GENERIC OLD GUY STUFF BLAH BLAH.
Me: Hahahahahahahahaha
Yea, you get the idea. What a tool. What the hell was he going to tell the police when he called?!? Some scary guy is walking around with an ax on halloween? Yea, I'm sure they would have been on TOP of it. Jesus what a numbskull. And for that matter, if I were so motivated I could have walked up and buried it in his head and walked away. I was wearing a MASK. How are you going to describe me to the cops?
Anyway... I'm just saying it's a pretty sad state of affairs when I am standing there in a freakin' halloween costume calling a grown man immature. It all seems backwards to me.
Mmm, the sweet sweet sounds of terror.
So as usual, some asshole has been seriously difficult getting pictures and video to me. This time it's Adam Calme. I'll pay $1 to the person that beats him into sending me the rest of that stuff.
Anyway, halloween is fun. Anyone else for replacing some gay holiday like April Fool's day with another halloween so we can have it twice a year?